Middle of nowhere

I'm sitting on the ledge waiting for the time to fly
People walked pass a guy with bandage on his right arm;sprained from excessive carrying of boxes.
The weather is rather humid today and thanks to the sound/air pollution, it adds up to the city-like feeling.
I have yet to bump into anyone I know. Should I be thankful or does that make me an anti-social person?
Strangers smile at me. I return the gratitude. Why shouldn't I?

I'm having my break now in 1901. Soon,someone will join me for a hotdog meal. The tantalizing taste of New York Chicken never fail to satisfy my tummy.

In front of me is an old lady begging for a decent meal. Her source of pityness comes from two innocent children sleeping by the walkway. One barely a year old and the second seems like a healthy 3 year old who's supposed to be having fun with kids his age. Not where he is now.

I pity them.

I have a few fears that haunt the living shit out of me eversince I was a child.
One of them is balloon.
I don't know why I'm very afraid of balloons. Burst balloon especially. Phobia perhaps? I had to deal with my fear today as I was the one pumping and distributing the balloons to my sandwich men. Everyone wants a helium balloon. I can make a fortune selling balloons to them.
Since it was free, you see children , teenagers , parents and even old lady came and ask balloon from me.

I was happy. I want to be a balloon man if there is any chance again. I'm happy being the balloon man =)

Happy new year everyone !

Some things are better left untouched.

Today is just another pictorial day. There I was in the middle of the crowd , just waiting for people to pass me by. I had shoulders rubbing against mine. Noises from cars I chouldn't careless. Different walks of life in front of me and none of them knew me. It is great to be foreign, sometimes.

So I just stood there. And froze in time.



Maybe I ought to move. Nibble my way out from the pack of people. But why do it if everything around you seems perfectly in place.

The last chapter

When you start counting the hours , nothing can be good anymore
Let alone a mundane 9 to 5 on the clock, or if the pay is lucrative.
If you don't feel belong anymore that's where the trouble starts.

I know I had been bitching about my current company in numerous occasions I couldn't recall,
whine so much about the management or how sucky it has become till everyone starts to yawn,
or even complaining about regrets that shouldn't have been made in the first place.

2006 is ending in a couple of days, and it has always been the same old years that has gone by previously. Just a normal routine of new resolutions, and reflection of what I have accomplished for the past 12 months.

I have to say, this year is remarkably productive if I were to put the whole picture together. Not a grand of stories worthy enough for a book or even something to be proud of, but still, just by looking back at specific months, somehow there are tiny fragments of memory that are worth jotting down on my buku tiga lima.

Just today I had a new task and was station in the heart of Bukit Bintang for some Digi roadshow. No, it's not like those yellow sperm suit you catch on TV, but similiar to it.
I am to escort a group of 'sandwich' guys/gals to parade around the golden triangle, and mind you, it ain't easy. My legs are killing me and I started sweating like a pig after just a couple of minutes under the scorching sun.

It's 'fun'. Really!. But knowing the fact that I have to work through New Year is not something you would want to remind me. I'll fuckin burn your house! and rip your teddy bear !
I will !
I'm evil !

Seriously. I'm like the worse paid bangla ever.

*sigh*

Recently, I realise that I have a very very veryyyy huge flaw hidden somewhere within me. I was reading Robert Peltzer's "a teenager's journey" where he talks about how bad his childhood was, and how he endured abusive remarks, and constantly being tormented from his mom. He couldn't let go of his past and live his teenage life doing all the wrong things that one could possibly imagine; drugs, alcohol and girls. He couldn't move on with his life. No matter how hard he tried to forget about the spiritual torture his mom left him, he couldn't be free. He had a lifetime scar, just like me. Only mine was different from his.

It's kind of hard to explain right now because everything is still very much vivid. A simple text goes a long way if you still have part of it in your heart. I really really need to move on and what makes me sad is I thought I did. The difference is I'm much stronger now, emotionally.

I definitely need a closure and I'm confident I'll get it soon.

The outcome, I dare not imagine.

25th December

Snowflakes,
inches of snow on the walkway,
Carolling,
Cookies and warm milk,
Gifts under the x-mas tree,
Santa's magical moment,
Elves and reindeer,
melting snowman,
couple kissing under the mistletoe,

sights of christmas i wish to see every year.

Merry Christmas Everyone ! =)

First attempt on Haiku

My first haiku
Begins with bang
Ends with dang?

Friday was ecstatic
Ferry Corsten is God
Loud! Electronic! Ferocious!

His hard-earn autograph
on a lousy printed leaflet
Frame it up or Ebay?

Saturday in Finnegan's
celebrated Kit's birthday
night of drinks, dart and drama

All thing ends well,
So we thought it would,
How wrong.

No casualties,
for a free flow evening,
only one broken heart

Sunday morning in bed
Just staring at the ceiling
waiting for gold to drop.

I got a twitch
on my right eyebrow
someone's stabbing me

I spend a fortune
I don't recall
on food perhaps.

blurry and in daze
stuck between spaces
he misses her so.

writing haiku in office,
getting ridiculous
time to jump the boat

Haiku haiku haiku

Hokkien lessons

I can't stop laughing watching this.

Something to cheer the office mood =)





not funny i chop !

hehe

My Diamond Baby

No, I'm not giving out diamonds. Diamond is not my baby either.

As I remembered,mind game that my brains went cuckoo was GodTower,

then when I got stucked at question 40-ish, i stopped playing.

Not till today, when I stumble upon My Diamond Baby.

I would have been fired today if caught, because I was practically playing this game the whole day

and I haven't fucking finish it yet.

Damn susah ok.

Don't blame me if you feel like throwing ur keyboard and mouse.

My kind of night

Another warm, windless night. Everyone seems to be away.
I was too bored at home , I went for a walk.
As usual, the neighbourhood was quiet as a soul.
The only noise I hear was my own footsteps.
My light took two minutes and 45 seconds to be exact.
Evaporated together with the time i intend to kill.
My shadow blends well with the trees,
It gave me the sense that I wasn't alone.
A lost man stopped to ask for directions.
I directed him hoping he'll reach safely.
Look to the skies, there wasn't any stars,
Only clouds that hid the moon so shy.
A frog lay still on an unfamiliar ground,
My leg was inches away from ending its life.
It never move, it never jump.
What a brave green frog, I said to myself.
I wish I had a dog to walk with me,
Just like the one I saw that day.
Call me mad, call me sad.
At least I had my mango with me.

Spellbound

"To him she seemed so beautiful, so seductive, so different from ordinary people,
that he could not understand why no one was as disturbed
as he by the clicking of her heels on the paving stones,
why no one else's heart was wild with the breeze stirred by the sighs of her veils,
why everyone did not go mad with the movements of her braid,
the flight of her hands, the gold of her laughter.
He had not missed a single one of her gestures, not one of the indications of her character,
but he did not dare approach her for fear of destroying the spell- Gabriel Garcia Marquez "

The last month

The growing intense politics in my company is driving me up the wall. The bosses just wouldn't listen to what the subordinates have to say. He just side the wrong side all the time and it's jeopardizing the mood and the morale.
There is not a single doubt in my mind that if I have a chance to drill some sense into his brain, I would do it, IMMEDIATELY.
I'm contented but will definitely move on if better opportunity arises. Heck, the company still owes me 5 off days. I just hate the undecisive decisions and last minute calls.

Getting on is the last month of the year. We are in the month of December and Christmas is just around the corner ! What the heck happened to the last 11 months? It's a shame that no major celebration is going to take place this year. Everyone has their own plans way earlier before we can decide on a small party. Just too bad.

Make a date this middle of the month with non other than the God of Trance; Ferry Corsten !! I'll be going there , 101% guarantee. His sets are bound to lift the mood. =) Remember, don't get wasted before he plays. Been awhile since my last clubbing scene, but this is a cannot miss event.


Tommorow is going to be bulat's birthday, so I'm going to wish him earlier here;

Happy Birthday Shannon Lung !!

keep on beroxxing !

ps: pictures will be up after QC =)

Sentence

The evening spells excitement
Been awhile since her radiance light the night
She smells like angels ought to smell
I fire up a cigarette and hands her mine tasting her lips on it
and suddenly my heart's pounding so loud I can't hear anything else
All the things I see in your eyes, the perfect eyes
So calm and innocent it sparkles like stars in a clear bright sky
She's soft and warm and almost weightless
Her perfume is sweet promise that brings tears to my eyes
I wanted to tell her that everything will be alright
That I'll save her from whatever she's scared of and take her far far away
Finally,still pictures of her eases my sleep
I wouldn't wanna Imagine what the real thing could do
I'm too dumb to put the whole picture together yet, but
whatever she said made a heartache; her current stand and persuade
The commas and word means nothing without the fullstop.
I'm certain for sure now that I'll wait for the next sentence to start

Gemini Man

A man in this Zodiac has a thin long and proportional face.
He has a high forehead and very cleaver.
He looks like he can not stand or sit still, a very fast person.
His nose is just right in size, thin lips, talk fast and very talkative.
He can think faster than he talks, but once he start talking, he will talk non stop as if god has gifted him with that special talk machine mouth.
He likes to cut his hair short and he is very athletic.
He is a tall, slim and every movement of his is "Fast" or nearly call "Hyperactive".
He has a long fingers and always tapping on table or moving his finger as if he is trying to grab something.
He is the type who will write or scribble on paper, he never stay still.
His hair always well comb or neat.
He will spent a long time to comb his hair.
He will keep his manicure and pedicure clean.
He is a well dress and clean guy, so if you like cleanliness, you will love him.
He will keep all his cloth in big closet, and never throw away even shirts he never wear any more, but yet he still keep buying new cloths and make sure he is in style.
He knows how to dress well even with a low budget.
He get bored easily with his favorite cloths , cologne.
He is very picky, so soap and his cologne even have to be in the same trend or same scent.
If you date this kind of guy, you might think you are dating 2 guys, you will have to guess his feeling and emotion.
Is he doing thing because it is a duty, or is it because he wants to?
He change his mind as fast as he change a new pairs of shoes.
He can pick up a book and roughly read through and understand it's contents, so if you see a Gemini man who reads the whole book, then he must be influenced by other Zodiac.
He hate to set fix schedule, and dislike a boring same routine job.
He could hardly be on time, and can only keep time if it is complete important and necessary.
He does not come late because he forgets, but because he always find other attractions along the way.
He likes to act opposite to what he wants to do.
He is a very good speaker and make a very good politician.
He can easily persuade other people and well presented himself in public, a real charmer.
If he is a writer, he will write the best seller.
He always search for truth and constantly study himself.
He never satisfy about his fame, his reputation or money, because he thinks he deserved more. He will keep searching even he is not sure what is his ultimate satisfaction.
Woman in love normally wants to feel secure and stable, but if you fall in love with this guy be prepare to be alone.
He will come to see you when he feels like it.
He won't even know how he spent his days everyday, so adjust yourself if you love him.
Dating him is like dating 2 guys, so today he can tell you how much he loves you, but tomorrow he might call you to cancel your date.
When he upsets, he could tell you he hate your dress, even it is the same dress he used to tell you make you look very sexy.
Do not ask him why he is that's way for he won't have any explanations too.
When he is back to normal mood, he will take you out again and forget what just happened.
You can not expect him to be the same person now, and forever.
His changes will depend on you, for better or for worst.
If you like to take risk and dare for challenges, you will get along with him fine.
He keeps his emotional secretly as if hiding it, so you will not be able to see if he crazy in love with you, or does not give a damn at all, but be calm and patient.
He will never leave you if he thinks you are a puzzle, then he will spent times solving this puzzle.

Hmm, at least i'm human =)

Have a nice day !

A night to remember

It's always nice to deep into the pool and just float, regardless of when and purpose.
Yesterday night was simply amazing. It was Max's birthday and for the first time in many months, I enjoyed myself.
The last minute plan almost ruin the night,but luckily I made it in time to catch the guys before they headed out. I drove through jungle and heaps of road till we arrived to Paula's apartment. I must say, everyone was surprised when the place we were gonna chill was beside the pool.

The guys brought along some food and of course booze.

After getting our stomach stuffed with food, JD and I couldn't decide whether should we jump into the pool or not. Honestly, I wasn't prepared but thank goodness for the football shorts. JD made his presence noticed and went in first. I followed on after a couple of COKE and chicken wings =) .
I tell you, swimming in the middle of the night really shrink the balls out of you. It was damn freaking cold ok. Mahai. Really sok tan until cannot sok.

Paula was kind enough to bring us towel from her apartment and we managed to persuade her to the pool too. I think She's one happening cool chick at her age.

The turn off point was when a residence shouted "Do you know what time is it? It's 3 am and you guys are swimming !"

Ahaha, luckily it was a human who was shouting, not some white being with long hair standing on the edge of the hill. Apparently, the place was haunted , but who cares anyway.
In the end, we packed up and ran to the cars as if we were fleeing from a crime scene. No evidence was left behind except for ciggerete butts and chicken bones. =)

All in,it was a night to remember. This is 1 thing that I will always remember.

Happy 21st Birthday Maximilius Abbas Wan ! and stop hacking my multiply MOFO!

Tip tap tip tap

I'm bored. Are You?
If yes,feel me.





don't say i didn't warn you.

Something about the truth

Here I am half past three looking at the screen not knowing what to write.
My mind is rather empty from the hectic schedule and the morning shower awakens my urge to pen an entry.
A week has gone , a collection of thoughts linger in my already fickle mind. The harder I try to forget , the deeper it gets into the back of my head.
I've not been in this stage in a very long time, needless to say I'm contented to move. Time is the only reason I can give to start making pace again. To walk once more.

I sat in the park today, looking at children passing through mazes , swinging their way to joy and running off happily to their guardian. They looked happy. Was I once like that? I hardly could recall.
Don't get me wrong, I love my childhood. Eventhough it's the faintest of my memories, but sweet ones still lives inside me. I remembered how I almost fell to my death , scratched in the face leaving a clear scar and perhaps being caught stealing money just to buy slurpee from 7-eleven. Haha, that wasn't sweet , was it.

I had sweet ones, really. Too many to bore anyone =)
I want to be a kid again. Just for a day. I want to eat cotton candy and waste my time in the park. Or play hide and seek and never be caught. Or tell lies and still look innocent ! Or get small little pecks from strangers and have no clue why they even do it in the first place ;) . I just want to feel young again and never grow up!

24 years down the road . Amazing how it just flashes pass your very eyes. Am not enjoying every single moment of it. Should have had in the beginning and not thinking about the regrets.
Funny thing is, I'm still learning how to live. I guess something never ends till your last breath.
I wonder whether as the generation change, will life be complicated as well? I'm sure our parents have not thought about the future when they were our age. Or have they , if not we would'nt be around in the first place. =)

I believe we live in a world where 24 hours is never enough. Never enough to do anything of any interest. Especially sleeping. I have come to my sense that everything needs to be in a balance, like the nuts between the legs or the pillar that holds a building . Without balance, it will just collapse and drag you down together with the earth. Without balance, we just live in a world of selfishness and end up being a lonely sadistic chap. I'll start my balancing soon. And just wait what's coming ahead of me !

If life was a person, I'll say "bring it on mofo !"




james bond rox =)

Chasing you

I believe that sweet memories stays in you forever, and bitter ones eventually fades away.
I believe some things are made to last, and some just dissapears at the shortest of time.
I couldn't be bothered about the future because what awaits ahead is pretty scary. By the time you know it, life's too short you won't even know it's coming.

Someone told me chasing girl is like chasing cars, you wouldn't know what to do when you really have one. I presume part of it is true.

How I feel right now doesn't matter anymore because the distance kept us away. Those 3 words I couldn't say is going to die in me. The closest I've ever been is sitting next to you in movies. All that I ever was is here in your perfect eyes, they're all that I can see.
It would be a lie if I said I stopped thinking about you, because I do think about you whenever I'm alone. If I lay here, would you lie with me and forget the world?

Very late post, I'm so sleepy i don't know what I'm writing, haha . Italic phrase is taken from chasing cars by snow patrol. Really a lovely song.


and the long awaited pics are here !! Finally =) sorry too busy la

Bangla at work

Yay, I'm in the exact same spot where I was sitting on Sunday. In A Bloody Cyber CAFE in Sungai WANG !!! Woohoooo! fucking lame rite? haha

It's raining and I've done visiting outlets. And don't even think about asking me to walk around this lala-infested complex because I've already visited every nook and corner there is. Sien until can see flies flying around my cap.

Really la !

Do banglas have offdays when they work? I'm sure they do. Prolly once a week? If the answer is yes, then I admit I'm in a state where I'm worse than them. Event EVENT EVENT, Killing my Sense ! Yay it rhymes .

I've worked 12 days now without any off days. And thinking back about makes me a complete fool. Why am i so hardworking ?!! Why did i not take any MC ?!! why why why fucking hell, I'm all drained up . Tank emptying real soon.

I wanna go holiday! So badly. I just imagine myself on an island with a glass of Malibu. Was contemplating about it for quite some time already, and just yesterday there's this huge sign:

"Phuket + Pattaya = RM899 6 days 5 nights"

WHOA ! Is this godsend?

I think it is ! hahaha now the question is should I or should I not ?

So tempting sial! Can pay by credit card mah ! enjoy first, suffer later. haha

See you guys soon, running out of credit

and

Happy birthday Julian Edwin Matthew... You rox ! not

The days are gone

Sorry for the lack of updates, been pretty occupied with work and new projects.

Too many things has happened within a week or so and there were things i never thought of doing and time seems to be out of reach , constantly going too fast i hardly could catch up with.

Friends who came into my life and friends whom i no longer knew. Friends who treat u as brothers, close friends who seems to be drifting apart. I felt that the circle of friends that I hang out with are slowly stepping out 1 by 1 to make new smaller circles. It may still be connected in 1 way with your circle but things just ain't the way it used to be.

Is that part of moving on? We used to complain about the lack of 'spice' in our life and seems like everyone dig deep to find the spices and forgot about the 'pot' . Ahahah what rubbish analogy.
Anyhow, It's not a bad thing, and I'm not complaining either, it's ur life anyway. AND I'm not going to be a hero or play GOD to make everything back to normal but I do hope that our frequent yumcha session and meeting up are not limited to just birthday parties and clubbing. =/
It can be lonely sometimes, but who am i to complain?

Few days back ago in SS15, i had an incident with mother fucking snatch thief who seems to terrorise our peaceful neighbourhood nowdays. It began after my training in Streamy X outlet near SJMC. It was roughly around 8pm and the streets wasn't well lid. So, my colleague who happens to walk across to my car while talking on the phone was the victim here. She felt suspicious because there was a Malay guy with helmet walking on the road but the motor was nowhere to be seen. So we were half a feet away from my car and suddenly this guy tried to grab her sling back and handphone. She screamed and held my arm, and luckily she was close to me. I chased that fucker and got hold of his sling bag assuming that it was my colleague's. Dragged him down and i got pulled down to the ground as well. A few feet away was his mother fucking friend who was waiting on the bike tryin to get a quick escape. He got out from his bike and tried to kick me. I was on the ground and tried to kick him so that he will stay away from me. The fucker who went down with me tried to throw punches at me. I stood up and demanded the bag from them. They shouted they didn't take anything from my colleague. It was bad. Luckily there was a Kenari driving past and it stop knowing what had happen. I took down the number plate "WDC 3459". They sped off with the half ruin motorbike. It was damaged because the guy on the bike dropped his bike while trying to save his friend. This fucker tried to fool people by removing the number '3' on the bike, so if anyone tried to take their license plate would only see 3 numbers instead of 4.

It happened really quick, and who would have thought that this thing will happen ? Noone was hurt, nothing was taken, that's a good thing. But the fuckers were gone. Just be alert and be realy really careful whenever you walk on the road. You never know what might hit you next. My colleague was left traumatised by the incident, but the main thing is , she's ok.
This fuckers who commit such despicable act shall rot and burn in hell. We ain't save anymore ! Police corrupted, government siding the wrong side. Time to buy a boat and escape to an island !
Anyone with me??? Guess not.

Muddy water

Yay I'm back from a brief vacation in PD and it was really nice. Could have been better but I'm still satisfied with the presence of non-stop fun and excitement =)

Although at times, i seem to isolate myself from the crowd and for you who didnt notice and did, I'm really sorry. I used to be a bubbly chap during trip and making silly jokes but this one was different i suppose. It wasn't intentional I swear, and I didn't made my silence unnoticed.

I was baffled by the truth of being where i am right now. I'm incapable of making decisions and like many times, i try to get untangled from this web of illusion. Who am I kidding anyway, to fall in love again?

I was browsing through my list on MSN and there was this quote by a friend which really hit me.

"If holding on is as hard as letting go, which would you choose?"

Honestly i will choose to hold on. Because no matter how hard it has turn to, it's always harder for her, and all you can do is hope one day she'll realise your sincerity. By holding on means you'll stick with her through thick and thin, ignoring the negative points and accepting who she is. I presume, that's the least you can do to make someone happy.

Continuosly thinking about it, i get vivid pictures of you in my head and having that tiny moment was enough to force a smile on my face. I'm not a fortune teller who can predicts the future, or a mind reader who can encrypt a person's mind, I'm just an ordinary boy who falls for a girl and not knowing what to do.

I never made my intentions clear and I believe some things are better left unsaid. I'll just wait for the rain to come and wash away my pain. We live in a country where rain do come very often, so I guess it's ok to sulk once in a while. If it doesn't rain, don't worry, I'll sleep it off and wake up to a better morning ;) I hope.

Have a nice weekend everyone.

Blurry

The ever insecure mind has struck again.
Stuck between choices which was not meant to be in the first place.
Deciding whether to move abroad or to stay afloat
Hoping to still be in one piece when i walk out from this mess.

Sometimes I hate the me in me.
I never had the guts to be strong
Slowly it eats up my confidence
and buries my face in a six feet hole.

----------------------------------

A few days more till my escapade
My only time alone in nature's best gift

The beach !

I look forward to the sunset
The sinking feeling between the sands
and not the
The polluted sea water
or
The disguise breeze covered in haze

I hope it's gonna be a fine fine evening. Clear skies and good company.

A perfect match, a perfect getaway !

Intuition

I believe movies are made in such a way that it leaves a footprint in your heart. Some movies can make an impact so huge it changes a person's perception towards life.

Just the other day, i finally managed to watch "The break-up" and i'm no different from every other person who watched it, I actually hoped for a happy ending. Boy, i was so wrong.

That show made me realize there is no guarantee in this world. There's no such thing as a perfect couple or match made in heaven. It's hard to believe coming from a person who believes in love at first sight, but the reality is a harsh thing to deal with.

Who wouldn't one to have a soul mate to live happily ever after with, but only a handful succeeded in finding them. You can't basically look for them in the corner of the streets or strangers whom sat next to you during your train ride home.

MAybe love just come knocking on your door when you least expect it to be. And maybe it's up to you to make the best our of it? Who knows, it's just another worthless theory.

As for me, I'm not sure where to stand right now. Whether to believe or not to believe, because the only thing that makes me believe is you.

Buses

I was granted wings when i barely knew how to walk.

Decided to keep my wings and walk instead...

I didnt knew where I was going but it was indeed a long road. Not complaining at all cos somehow I enjoy the moment alone.

Along the way, there were nice samaritans who stopped and ask whether i needed a lift. I decline gladly because it wasn't time yet.

Everything looks foreign when you have noone to share it with.

So I finally i decided to stop and wait for the right bus to come along. Fortunately, it didn't took long and the bus i boarded was what I had dreamt off all the time.

Comfy, secure, relaxed and best of all, it was going the right direction. Needless to say, it was one of the time of my life. My legs are worned out and i badly need something to rely on to take me further.

Whilst I was in the bus, it went through seasons of rain and sunlight, been through bumpy roads and long winding pathways.

Just as I began to feel attached to it, the bus driver decided to drop me off. I was devastated because i knew i had to walk again. Wasn't given any valid reason, so I was left hanging.

Once again, I was left to use my tired legs to continue my search. For 5 long years, I've never once boarded another bus again because I knew, it will never be the same bus that I've been on before.

I was wrong. I saw the same bus that i boarded before right in front of my eyes and didnt flag it down.

I began my chase. and thankfully the bus stopped and pick me up. I sat down on the chair and began to feel at ease. Somewhat feeling that I've experienced before. The ambience and interior looks the same like it has never changed since i last recall.

Then it hit me, it's a completely different bus but the exact resemblence to the previous 1.
I smiled and doze off, hoping that it will bring me to where I'm supposed to be.

Been awhile...

Great to know that things are slowly falling into thier respective places. I'm so glad that the turbulence days are finally coming to an end. At least for momentarily.

Job is good, could have been worse. I've learned to live with it and it makes me a stronger person. Though, i'm not staying for long cos i don't enjoy what I'm doing. Especially when people screw u up at the very last minute and it wasn't entirely your fault. It get's depressing when you actually think of the nature of the work.

JAck the devil is finally back from the land of sheeps. Weeee! I sense much sins are on their way >;)
I am guilt-ridden from my previous antics of living in the shadow of alcohol weekly. So it's been awhile since my last sip and it starts to pay off cos i have more money for food ! Haha

Talking about food, the last time I weighed myself was back in April and back then it was 63 kg.
Now, i dare not step foot on the weighing machine again because ever since i found out that I am 7kg heavier, i wonder where did all the food add up to?? I don't look plump thank god for that, but the fact that every night of pounding on to supper and the lack of exercise really creeps me out of what i may become in the future. I don't want to be called a fatty =(

And Hell no i'm cutting down on food. I'll just continue eating till I realize that I don't have a neck,then I'll start applying for gym >.<

It was mid-autumn festival yesterday, and I somehow did something different compare to the previous years. Everyone deserves to celebrate it despite the heavy workload of assignments =)
Besides, it's the only day that you can actually lid a lantern and walk on the street without being catch by police . hehe

At the end of the day, I'm glad it brought smile to your face.

Who needs the moon when you can see someone else smiling? =)

Wake me up when September ends.

How can a month evolve a person into a complete stranger to himself?
I hardly know myself and i've forgotten what i pursue in life like i used to. It has been a very turbulence month for me from work to friends and towards someone whom i have affection for.

I knew disaster is bound to hit me one of these days from the procastination act that I have developed since beginning of the month. What's even more pathetic is the fact that only my blogs hear my whines. I'm so fucking introvert it depresses me whenever it pops into my head. I chose to live this way and it's my decision to stay that way.

I badly need a break from reality and jump straigth to a deserted island. Forget everything and start writing on the sand. Or deep into the water and scream as loud as I can. Honestly, I'm not happy at all , and if i'm smiling, it's just a mask.

My mom could see through my fragile face and jsut the other day, asked me whether everything is alright. I lied to her not wanting her to worry about me. She has enough worrying to do then to take care of me. I'm 24 for christsake, i need to sort it out myself. However, I'm not sure where to begin.

Morale has reduced to zero and the enthusiasm remains below par level. For the past few days, i've been a total moron neglecting alot in life which jeopardises my current state. All i can come up with are lame excuses to run away whenever i can. Dont remind me, i feel shitty myself.

Just today, I almost hit rock bottom and was trying real hard to climb back up and forget about the day. Ended up going against my words and commited a sin. Few puffs away and I'm back on my feet. I guess I'll be relying more on it than I used to.

Lucky for me, the night was fruitful with food and booze. It was one of the bosses birthday and we had a bash in the office. Managed to gobble up a few slices of pizza and was constantly hiding myself from being a victim of alcohol. Tried to hide many times, but many times I failed to do so. I wasn't drunk though, just enough to stay concious and drive back home.

There were girls, and it was wild. I stayed low profile but ended up being molested. =.=
Seriously. It was scary.

Then it came clear to me, it would have been better if I spoke with you tonight. It didn't happen but I thought about you throughout the night, where could you possibly be right now, or what you might be doing at that very moment.

Decided to call it a day so i drove home alone with David Tao playing on the background, I couldn't understand a single word he was singing, but it sure is depressing just to hear his voice..

It hit me so clearly then, that I actually do miss you.

Putra Jaya

Ever wonder what happen to your moolah from taxes? Part of it went to feed our beloved king and most of it went on to build roads .

I was driving in Putrajaya just yesterday ,trying to look for Carrefour but ended up getting lost in a land where state of the art buildings are built. One word, amazing !
If you are looking for really nice designs from buildings, putrajaya is the place. It really gives u the feeling that you are already in the future. The roads are so wide, it puts our highway to shame. The solar street lights blends in with its unique design. And guess what,there wasn't any rubbish anywhere on the road !

If you add concept cars into the picture, you'll get a taste of what future look like. However, your joy will only be shortlived, because during my journey, i could not spot a single chinese and indian soul walking or driving on the road. It creeps me out! Prolly hiding at home counting the chickens? Who knows.

Nevertheless, its a great place to stay if you are willing to give up entertainment and don't mind paying for tolls. In exchange, you'll get a peace and quiet home, away from pollution and traffic jams.

That's how i spend part of my Sunday. Getting lost =)

A happy post?

I wanted to be among those lucky people who found their soul mates, but being there just seem impossible right now.
And I thought the journey has begin, until it hit me that i'm not even close to the surface.
Do I step foot into the calm water and wait for it to ripple? I have doubts about going deep, for I may not know what's beneath the tempting water.

I walk alone sometimes, to the park nearby my house, or to the nearest burger stall just to satisfy my craving. Yea, I'm seriously out of my mind , alone outside in the neighbourhood , on foot in the dark and exposing myself to stray dogs and orang minyak. I needed time alone , so this is what I normally do when the sky turns dark and when i can't sleep. =)

I walk !

Crazy as it seems, somehow it calms my day and resets my tired mind. I don't carry my phone around , only few bucks enough for my burger and drinks in 7-eleven and not forgetting my ID of course. I live a very boring life now, revolves around work , friends, sleep, yumcha and looking forward to the weekend. Nothing spectacular to cheer about. Adding to the agenda is my will to finally stop smoking and booze. Occasionally drinking , maybe la, but right now, I'm back to second hand smoke.

Honestly, no apparent reason at all. Just feel like doing it =)
So far so good i guess.

I can feel the breeze coming through the window right now, so gentle and soothing, like someone breathing next to your skin. Ok this is irrelevant.

Weekend is nearby , and I hope it would be great ! Looking forward to it since my last break. I smell chillis ! =) IS the plan still on?

I wonder again.

Clear conscience!

So i made it through the weekend holding my thoughts to myself.

All i hear is echo bouncing back to me, random whispers buzzing my ear and still images running wildly in my mind. I never get the overall picture though, only blurry most of the time. Maybe I'm just being paranoia, who knows?

=)

I know loneliness is eating me up when I picture myself together with you on a beach and only to realize that it was only a dream.

I wish i could gather enough courage to tell you how i felt about you, especially when you just stood next to me and there's nothing I can do.

The times when you felt that your world is crumbling down because the person you love gave you up, but you didn't realize that there was another person who would give anything just to have that chance.

Why do you set a benchmark and let his world revolves around yours when all he did was break your heart?

You shut your heart and seal it tight as if he's the only one who has the permission to open it.

Sincerity has no limit and I'll keep pouring it to you, hoping one day you will finally pick it up and mend your broken heart.

Let me know, when I can stop chasing your shadows and start walking with you.

For I'll wait the day, when falling in love with you shows no fear of vulnerability but gives you the strength to move on together.




ps: i will post a happy entry next ok =) promise!

Trip through you

I am so tired
Bone-scratched and empty too
Always, I have waited but I've
Never known such wonder
And then you come and touch my face
Then you come convince me I'm safe

I trip through you.

Misery?

How would you know if you had sway from course of nature?

Diversified from the path that you planned to walk and into an abyss.

Knowing that what awaits you from the tiny fraction of light would not be what you were actually expecting.

and the fear of making the next step might ignite a bleak future.

The only thing i'm holding tightly on is hope.

Although hope is merely a word to comfort souls who are lost, i'm still clinging to it for I know it will lead me out from this misery.

what misery you say?

Walking alone in the valley of shadow of death.

KaCheeng !

I'm crapping , ignore this post .

Surviving !

I'm still standing !
I gotta reward myself for going through a week of gruesome working hours and constant away from office to be stucked in traffic jams around KL and still found it bearable to work.

Yippee ! in the process, i had a rift with 1 of the directors and fell sick the following day.

Truthfully speaking, I'm not entirely happy with everything ! I just don't know how to explain in detail what's really bothering me. It's like hanging on a tight rope and not knowing whether to move forward or go back to where you begin and realizing that any wrong turn u make, u'll end up falling into a pit.

I'm completely hopeless when it comes to making decisions.

In the midst of being occupied by workload and stressful environment, i think it's nice to receive
short smses on your whereabouts. It just made you feel good. Dont you think so?

And since then, I have always looked forward in seeing you , and somehow I did.

You gave me a sense of calmness and lifted the burden off my shoulder.

It keeps playing in my head, after sending you home, when will i get to see you again.

A bad twist of friendship.

It's amazing how friendship take a twist when misunderstanding pops up from nowhere

Honestly speaking, I have not a god damn clue what went wrong but somehow, when I came online i was left with an offline note asking me to delete photos in friendster and so on. Hmm clueless ??? Tell ME about it.

Is minding my own business a crime nowadays? I wonder..

Speaking about possesive boyfriend, geez, I've seen the worse today. Thanks for the eye opener.
And girl, it's a shame that this has to end,and I won't wreck your relationship with your bf. I never intended to anyway in the first place. If i did offend you in anyway or made it hard for you, I'm really sorry.

Life goes on, and I'm already in a mess right now with work. These will be the least of my problems. =)

Good luck to you and your future undertakings. Is dropping by a message on your birthday prohibited too? I hope not. Too hard to resist as it falls the same date as mine.

See ya.

Transition

It's Sunday night, I'm not somewhere near my usual hangout place. Stuck with no internet connection and relying on just a pen and paper to kill time.

Third day of long working hours already felt like 3 months of immense pressure. I'm drifting away into something I wasn't expecting. Never expected to be such a rough ride going through all these, from client's complain to travelling aimlessly and getting lost , dealing with promoters mood swing, being ffked by them at the very last minute and finding a replacement at the same time. Too much to bear if you look at it.

Welcome to the real event world.

Comparing this to support center, the turnover rate seems to be much higher. Human will always be human, there are bound to be excuses when an intention of slacking off is there.

I'm trying real hard to build an immune system to counter such event whenever it occurs to me. I guess I can handle the workload and stress at the moment. The thought of giving up came across my mind couple of times BUT it's not the time yet.
Besides, the real challenge haven't even started yet. I have to will to go on, just encouragement that i need.
I'm definitely not looking forward for the next meeting tomorrow discussing about the agenda so far. I need a kevlar vest, anyone has one?

Enough of whining >.<


I hate the fact of walking alone,
to some path I wish we could share,

I never skip thinking about you,
from the moment i open my eyes,
to the time I said goodnight,

most of the time it hurts,
as the more I care,
the further you run away.

I never had the chance to confess,
for I know I can never be another 'him'.
who treats you like a princess
And at times made you his queen.

I don't want to risk our friendship
to an unknown relationship ahead
Because knowing you right now,
is better than not knowing you at all.

I hope when the time is right,
you'll be there waiting,
Accepting a fool like me
willingly, with open heart.

the end.

Floating thoughts

My new job just started today and since then I've been feeling the workload pilling up my shoulders.

I realized i just signed a contract to slavery and the end of my social life. Remember I had a policy of not working on Sundays and it will take a shotgun in my face just to be in the office. I guess I've gone against my word and the meaning of 'relaxation' somehow just evaporized into thin air.

It's only the first day of work and I can forsee myself being a complete zombie for the coming weeks. Part of me hope that I can gather some free time and spend it with my friends and how I look at it , time is not letting me do it.

Yea it's that bad till I don't even remember when my off day is scheduled.

Everything has to start somewhere, and this is gonna be a test of how far I can actually push myself to go further. I enjoy what I'm doing right now ; meeting people and going places, and MAYBE make a name myself. Something is just missing right now and I don't have the courage to pursue it.

You'll know when you are old when ;
You see people your age getting married and start having children of their own.

You'll know when you are busy when;
The only time you eat lunch is by eating it in the office.

You'll know how small money value has become when;
The budget came out and cigerette price went up by 20%

You'll know your previous job sucks when;
the current one has all the benefits you always wanted.

You'll know when technology is the essential nowdays when;
There is no internet connection and you feel oh so shitty about it.

You'll know you miss a person;
When the only thing you look forward too is to see her by the end of the day.

You'll know the meaning of dissapointment;
When your chance of slight happiness ended with rejection.

You'll know the feeling of lost;
When you come home and contemplate on blank hope.

You'll know hope is just a word;
When the feeling for someone just echoes in your heart, and not reaching her.

That summarized my whole point for today. Nothing much about it, just something that I need to pen it down. Besides, this is the only place to turn to when I'm feeling down. I just need to whine, that's all =)

It' funny how I even have time to blog when it's supposed to be my bedtime.

Goodnight people. See you soon.

Farewell McAfee

It's never easy leaving memories behind. Especially something attached to you for some period of time and I really have a heavy heart leaving all of them behind me.

I just submitted my farewell letter and it sure hurts being in my shoe right now. I dare to say that I can never find colleagues better than what I already had before and to know them at some point in my life is something I would treasure it for the rest of my life.

Thank you all, for being such a great listener , helping me out in covering my ass, sharing laughters in 3rd floor , walking ridiculous distance just to have chinese food, login early for me when I'm due to arrive late, taught me about life and how to overcome the pressure, made me laugh, made me realised that working is not about getting your job done, but having fun while you are doing it and pointing out my mistakes just to make me a better person.

Arigato.

My sleeping habit is going from bad to worse and I don't have a clue on what is going wrong.
I don't want to rely on pills or substance to make me sleep =(

I have this sinking feeling deep within and I can't exactly pinpoint what is the main reason to this. I need to clear my head before my new job kick off. Somehow, I think it's girl related and I'm too afraid to face it.

Being me right now just sucks. Haih

Hold On Hope

Surprisingly, I actually enjoyed my Monday morning and to begin a day with a smile really lightens me up. Thanks for terrorising my meebo so early and keeping me awake, Meanie =)

I actually wanted to lay low on weekends , not drinking or partying but just doing some catching up with friends.Somehow it only worked on Friday and by the time Saturday kicks in, my hormones automatically ran wild and the urge of consuming alcohol made me change my mind.
I had an eye opener over the weekend and I can come to conclude that,

I don't like my friends when they are drunk =( . Boohoo

This doesn't mean that I dislike them, just that I don't like the sight of them when they are not themselves , basically pissed drunk. I'm stating in general not specifically so don't bombard me with hate remarks. Honestly speaking, I hate being wasted myself and having people to take care of me. I already vowed not to drink as much as I should , don't wanna exceed my limit and get carried away just to forget about the real world. I'll give a headstart and tell you guys if i really need to.

I may not be the wisest guy on planet, or the person who looked like he has any relationship experience, but one thing that I can assure you , whenever you need someone to talk to, to hear your problems or whine about how bad thing is, I will lend my ears to you. If you need a shoulder to cry on or a semi-chubby guy to hug, I'll willingly offer myself.

Relationships issue are always the main culprit when it comes to bringing someone down to his knees. What a person will do for love, it's beyond imaginable. The worst part of all these is being left hanging by a moment and not knowing what will turn out next. Being stuck in between choices of moving forward or letting go is never easy, especially from the one that you don't want to get hurt from.

Whether you like it or not, somethings just doesn't go your way and the only comfort that you can give yourself is to accept the way things are.

Torn between lovers or torn between those who can't forget about their past relationships are inevitable one of the most cruel feeling a person could get. Somehow you looked like the third party, the float or the rebounder and somehow, you ain't any one of them. You are just putting the blame on yourself because you can't seem to make things better. Try not to feel shitty bout the whole thing, and pray hard that your only buddy, TIME is there to ease what you are going through. To prolong or shorten the whole process, that my friend, depends on you.

It takes time to heal , it takes time to change, it takes time to accept. Show some sincerity , I bet one day she'll get the message. I hope =X

Believe in yourself. Don't walk away so easily , I'm sure that's the right thing to do.

;)

dedicate especially to my buddies.

cheers

Hugs and kisses

o o x x o o x x O o x


Hug hug kiss kiss hug hug kis kis Big hug small hug small kiss

Jack Black rox my sox ! Naaachoooooooooooooooo

Holiday no more

It's been a week huh.

Life seems to be passing by real quickly and somehow stays monogamous for me. My holiday ended in a brief note of not doing anything productive.Nevertheless, i enjoyed the fact that i met with couple of new friends along the line and getting to know more about someone better which i should have done a long long time ago.

My feelings for the work that i'm doing right now has reduced to zero. Maybe the holiday mood still kicks in, but I'm going real slow it's killing my brain cells. I don't squeeze my brain juice anymore and laze around it's sick to even know they are actually paying for what i do.

Please don't let my boss see this >.<

Anyhoo, everything has been great so far. I'm hoping the next company that I'll be in will benefit from my wisdom and charming personality. Yea right ! I know you guys are laughing out there ! Kaninia -.-

Seriously, things has been going real smooth sometimes it scares me. The only concern that I have right now is my health and universal problem, moolah/money, the root of all evil. (actually i think woman is the root to all evil =.= j/k )

I've been smoking like a chimney lately and I'm really concern about what I'll grow up to be when I turn 30 or maybe 40. My grandpa lived till 80+ with the consumption of nicotine every single day and I just don't feel like taking the same risk as him. Who knows right where I'll end up the very next second. See how la, I'll stop when the time is right. Please give some encouragement and not laugh about it =( it 's very de-motivating ya know .

Should I exercise more too? Just yesterday, I went shirtless and my lil cousin tap on my tummy and called me a fatty. So innocent yet so true. My tummy size has not slim down since the last time looked into the mirror. I don't want to be categorized under the obese category anywhere in the near future so Mom if you are reading this, please stop cooking nice food for me to eat ok ! Hehehe
( i know those of you who don't receive any home cook food very often at home are prolly having a grudge on me and feel like kicking my sorry ass rite? please don't , you are always welcome to my house and steal my food . =P )

The last thing i keep reminding myself is to stop consuming so much of alcohol during the weekends. August has been a killa month for me and my wallet. Let's see, I've been in clubs every single weekend and on weekdays 7-eleven became one of my best buddies. God knows how much my credit card bill will end up when the statement arrives early next month. The debts has been pilling up it doesn't depreciate. Yup, credit card is another thing that doesn't depreciate, so live with it ! =)

I----Needddd ---- Tooooo Stoppppp UUuussinnggg mMMmMmmyyyy Cccreeddiittt CccccArrrrRddd

I guess most of you knew that I was actually involved in a police raid last week in Passion rite? It was such a painful new experience. Imagine you can't go to toilet to pee or shit when you really have to. Thank god my bladder was good enough to let me go through 3 long hours of misery. Phhewww . I was in there most of the time when they inspected every single one, and there was this joker who said something like "Who da fark take drugs in this kindda place?"

Apparently, to my surprise there was more female who got caught then male. Those girls are really notti notti spank spank . I heard that there was this girl who had positive results kept on insisting that she didnt take it. Ajoh, be a woman ...do da right thing!!! Follow like those smart guys who were caught la, sit at the corner like a small kid and smile innocently.

So limember, when you want to go partay with your girlprens and boyboy, don't take dwugs ok.

Ok I'm crapping already. SEe ya'll in the future.

pics here

The real football icons !

My glory days.. three of us were the only chinese guys among the football team. Proud neh!


Champions FC. See the guy in the middle, next to the blue Nike cap? Superstar man! Patah tangan also still can play football. =)

Anyone willing to scan pics for me?

Changing paths

And so my holiday has started...
Great, now I have more time for myself and nothing to prove.

I wanted to embark into some great adventure of travelling alone into some foreign country, get lost in translation and in the process met up with some hot chick who then invites me to her house for a bong session.
Such fantasies are so not going to happen when you dun have enough moolah. =(

Money surrounds us all whether you like it or not and at times, it swallows up your wildest imagination and breaks your heart, leaving you with nothing but dissapointment.

A few things which I never thought I would have done, happened. Like for example, I never threw a letter of resignation before and somehow I did. Many asked, whether I regretted doing so, and I can clearly say, NO.

Life's made of many choices , and regretting only makes you feel remorse and shitty. I chose to be happy, so that's why I'm leaving the company.

It wasn't a desperate measure, I just needed a break instead of sitting in the office and doing nothing. I feel useless ok.

Looking at the bright side, I got a job at the same time. Something which I wanted to do at some point of my life. Event line ! !! Couldn't be happier enough, cos my life's gonna change for sure. I get to keep myself busy and stop thinking about stupid stuffs. You know , those kind of things you think about when you are alone. ;)

Need to control my excitement for now, I know I'll feel likewise when things started to get real tough. Wish me luck k. Shon shon lei lei!

Anyone wants Lipton or Excel, just let me know, i make sure you drink until you jelak!

Heading out for lunch now...

pics for weekends here
Casualty for the week , OaK!

Tulan with Backstabbers

It's pathetic how human being can become in a corporate world.

Eventhough it's a dog eat dog world, never can I imagine someone who can come across such old school tactic of backstabbing. Whatever it takes to climb up the hierarchy chart really makes me puke.
As sly as he can be, I ain't fuking care no more. You can have my post or who ever's fuking post you desire. Go be a fuking shoe polisher for all I care and crawl in your own butt-licking world of yours.
For all the shit in the world , you are the dirtiest piece of shit you fuking maggot!
I'm ashamed to even know you what more you being a chinese yourself. Fuking disgrace.

I live my life the way I want too, you on the other hand, are 1 sadistic gutless bastard who prey for people consider you as a friend to make mistakes.

Good job prick.

Spoil only my holiday mood.

Kaninabehchaocibaitiunyamahhamkachan!

Sick

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
and that's why i'm wondering why
you had to tell me what's going on in your head
what's wrong
come around to another time when you don't have to run
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm dead sick. Don't even know why i bothered coming to work today. Cough is getting worse I hardly can recognise my voice anymore. Couldn't breath properly , just relying on my mouth to breath.

Going back from work. Took Half day today. I need more rest.

Definitely

A blank wish

I can barely sleep nowadays. Somehow part of me is draining away and I can't replenish it by sleeping early. My eyes just won't close , get it? I roll and roll to make myself tired but it doesn't help much.

Eventually, all i get is a big bad blank stare at the ceiling.

My weekend was fantastic, but I ain't talking much about it. Just to cut it short, there are moments where I felt embarassed and some which are rather surprising. At the end of the day, everyone enjoyed the company of each other and I sure enjoyed mine.

Yesterday night , something amazing happened. A group of us saw this shooting star out of nowhere and it was indeed remarkable, a once in a lifetime experience for me. I haven't seen 1 before in my entire 24 years of walking on the planent , so I was kindda thrilled with the whole thing.

It lid the dark sky for a moment and vanished quickly into sparkle of lights.

Somehow, I managed to make 2 wishes. I'm greedy >.<

But is it true that somethings are better just left unsaid?

For the time being , I think I'll keep it to myself 'first' .

I guess I'm introvert after all. ;)

No point spilling the beans if it's not going to happen anytime soon.

If only those words are meant to be heard, and you really mean it, that would have been great. For sure!

Busy as a bee now, Bye

Weekend pics as usual are here

Privacy please

Why do I have to wake up in the weee hours just to drag my sorry ass to work when the weather is so freaking nice to sleep? It was drizzling and apart of me wanted to just lay back and enjoy the cool morning breeze ...

I don't want to risk my reliable rice bowl by not turning up to work too=( .
......but but i want to sleep as well.

Bleh, screw the indecisiveness.

Don't you just hate making decisions?

It's gonna be another wicked weekend once again.. cos it's CLUBBINGGGG time~!!!!!

nothing excites me more than alcohol... muahhaha

yea babeh.. Next week too o1!!!!! I want my freaking doze of Malibuuuu

On a side note, I was reading Malay Mail yesterday and they mention about spreading false news on blog. Spreading rumours about politics can land the blogger in hot soup till the point that they can interrogate the owner.

Wow, cyberlaw taking effect in Malaysia heh ? Why the sudden urgency need of knowing what we post on our private space? Kaniniabu. Don't monitor our hamsap blog lar.
Lucky for me, i couldn't careless about politics and what's going on around the world. Yea , I'm a katak di bawah tempurung..

Give me sports ! and nothing but sports ! maybe add in a lil bit of saucy news about celebrities..
that's all i need to know. haha

Educative am I? =)
I thought so too.

I think I've done enough good deed to deserve my reward. I demand to have my candies placed on my doorsteps by hook or by crook . You know who you are !!!! Muahahaha

OK peeps, enjoy the weekend like there's no tomorrow cos that's what I'll be doing.

ciow de miow

Freaky

Freaky test.




If you can't see the instructions ;

Thinks of any 2 digit numbers EG: 14 , 23 , 67, 69

Add those 2 numbers and substract it with the original number. EG : 14 - 5 = 9

Stare at number 9.

Scary leh?

Japanese Crazy Stunts.

Gotta give Japanese game show producers credit.They are single handedly the most sadistic and hilarious people ever. On this game show contestants have to recite a tongue twister under a certain amount of time or they get slapped in the balls. Brilliant!



SAKITGILABABISENAKKAOKAO. I remembered being hit in the ballz during high school. and mind you, it's not accident. Some jokers from out of nowhere will come grab your balls and hit it hard like you've killed their parents.
It was a trend back then to hit someone's balls hard and see him suffer in agony for momentarily.

Yea and most of the time, you can hear people cursing "Mak KO!" and some fuckers laughing hysterically.

Really.

=)

My family gathering

It was family gathering again during the weekend as my uncle and aunty and their spouses came all the way down from Germany. My first time meeting my 5 year old Hongkie cousin and 3rd time meeting my German cousin.

Ok lar, lazy to write, without further adew a run through introduction of my family =)

We gathered ourselves in Restoran Sam You somewhere near PJ Assunta hospital.

This is my family. Serious or not my face? Actually leh, I acting only, i'm very easy going and like to hee-ha 1

My Sam Yee Mah's family (3rd aunty)

My Sei Yee Mah's family (4th aunty)

This is my uncle and aunty from Germany lah! Leng lui leh my cousins? The small girl is so adorable and guess what, she enjoys playing football!!!

This is my Tai Yee Mah . She's the queen of the whole family and I respect her alot because she can be the coolest aunty one can ever have. My uncle look like the guy from KFC or not? hehe j/k.

Cheeky. She makes all the clown face when taking pictures. Typical notti lil kid. =)

My parents with notti kid. Wait, where am I? Holding the camera lar whatelse. !@#$%^

Me and cousins. I'm the second eldest in the whole family.

This is my gong-gong. If I'm not wrong he is around 80+. Still going strong !! He does most of the household work in my grandma's house. Terra leh?

Cousins.

Amboi, see lar...she damn layan me =) Muahahahah

=)

That's all. She'll be back to Malaysia.....in the next 4 years

or more.

Snow Patrol - Run

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done

And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear

Louder, louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

To think I might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbye
I nearly do

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear

Louder, louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

Slower, slower
We don't have time for that
All I want is to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads

Have heart my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if it's just for a few days
Making up for all this mess

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

No mood to do anything, internet is in snail speed , can't update blog, cannot upload photos, nothing to write, no appetite,

Symptoms of holiday?

Yea I badly neeed 1

Sinners

I HAVE SINNED

I'm not afraid to go to hell

I'm just afraid that I won't feel sorry for what I have done

For the booze and love flick

Alcohol Count
1 1/2 Bottle of Chivas
1 Bottle of Vodka
1 Jug of Malibu
1 Jug of Long Island Tea
2 Bottles Of Heineken
(I only had a few sips and 3/4 of the Malibu)

Kill Count
none -.-"(dang)

Coconut + Rum + Pineapple Juice = Mega ROX!
Malibu is so heavenly delicious makes my taste buds go wild . The next time I'm going to have 1 all by myself !!! ANyone who steals the straw from my jug is going to get castrated !
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED ! muahahah

It's been awhile since my last clubbing scene, and Saturday night was a blast. I was very very tipsy but not into the 'floating' mode yet. There was times I looked at the D-Link bottle and asked myself , why oh why in heaven did they fill it up with so much alcohol.
Much to my surprise was this Korean guy who just down the Chivas right from the cap. Prolly mixed with 1 gulp of Coke and that was IT. The gf followed his other halve's footsteps but was not that extreme.

Still, what a crazy couple O.o

We had our bottoms up in the carpark opposite the road as the bottles in Ruums are very pricey. I don't really enjoy Soul-T spinning , mainly because his set is just plain monotonous beat of bass. Imho , I think bass agents are much better that night. But still, I still feng a deng. Damn layan sial. Partly because of the alcohol kicking in lar. =)
The night ended early due to rumours of a police raid. Potong.

When we thought the night has ended, Ivan called all the way from Poppy. 3 of us sped down again to KL to help him only to find out that the 'drama' has been settled. -.-""""" Tulander.
It was cool though, cos we smoked a Skyline ! Tubby did. With alcohol influence of course.

Sunday.
11 peeple watched "Lake house" and only 1 couple, so do the maths. 9 mah lat lous watching sappy romantic flick and I had to sit next to Oak =) . He was trying so hard to coverline and just hiding his smirk. Hahahah I swear I saw water in his eyes >.< . He's full of love.

It's a good love story and there are a few phrases which really catches the heart. The love letters remind me of my youth. What happen to snail mail nowadays? Hmm

Watch it with your love ones. It's really good.

Sadly to say , I'm not even near there.

(pics on Saturday link here )
ciows.

Feeling dubious

I'm lost. Like really really lost ...
I don't have all the answers in the world
but hell I'm trying my best.

What da hell is wrong with me...
Why do I always have to be so skeptical.
I hate being cynical at times and it's really messing with my mind.

Mind putting a bullet through my head?

Please.

In exchange for a candy?

Nothing much

This song is BerRoxxing.

Dont wolli, it's not bom chak bom chak song.





Idle idle,
Suddenly i felt useless.
and the PC is really pissing me off. Keep on diskonecting only.

Why is human alwasy unsatisfied with with they have?
Does that make all of us greedy in one way?

The more I can't get it, the more I want it.Very farnee lar.. no meh?
Become monk the best, no need worry so much. Got food on the table, just eat nia. No need to worry about money and girls. So carefree. Sommore can get attention from so many peeple.

My unkle will be coming from Germany next week. Can't wait for the arrival of my Italy jersey and my angmoh cousin . *evil grin*

and NO im not bringing her out. First of all , I can't even speak German for goodness sake How am I supposed to ajak her out leh? Correct or not ?
She's also below the age limit, so got curfew and lastly I don't want her being swamped by hamsap lous . Take picture sudah lah. Kekeke

And lastly if you having a bad day, got kicked in the ass, got fried sotong or let people dump, here's a joke to cheer you up.

An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the *exact* words that were used to put the curse on you." The old man says without hesitation, "I now pronounce you man and wife."



WAHAHAHAAA

Got laugh or not?

Now pay me for the joke =)

No ending

I just found out something from my work place.

They had remote access to all the computers. So, if I'm really really unlucky, they are actually looking at what I'm typing in my blog.

HELLO ADMINS !! YOU GUYS SUXK!!!!KISS MY CHINESE WHITE ASS!! LALALA

One of my colleague got fired yesterday for breaching the company's policy. She failed big time man. Let's not go into it, but what she did was really extreme. =.="

I've been snoozing in the office nowadays and it's getting out of hand. Everytime i kept reminding myself to stay awake but most of the time it failed badly. Try coming to work at 5am with the office lights all off.

So tempting to oi oi leh.

----------------------------------

There's been few "What if" questions playing repetitively on my mind recently and I'm feeling really paranoid about the whole thing.

What if I quit this job now ?
What's really bothering me
-I'll be jobless . No income, no savings. Just rot at home and waiting for vultures to feed on my kutus. I don't want to sit at home with no moolah coming in.

What I intend to do
-Handing out several application form by the end of this month, my leave has approved for 10 days nearing the end of August. I just pray lar, I get what I want during that period of time.

Worst scenario
-Stay back and work my ass off on a 8.5 hours job =*(

This is the main concern right now. My career path. Others are just tiny mini personal stuffs which I don't intend to write it down.
Eventually, it will just fly off together with the wind.

Which is worse? ;
unable to express? or expressing at the wrong time?

Letting go has been very difficult. I've been holding on for something that has no ending. I didn't let go because I had faith in you. Until i realize I'm just walking on a blind path. All these while , I wanted to tell you it was a misunderstanding,and that maybe one day, against all odds, we can be together once more.

I hate being emo.

I wasn't like this before I met you.

Why did I turn out this way?

Haih.

Hooray ! Weekend !

WEEKEND POST !!! woohoo

This week is like 1 flying bullet train.. Si beh fast neh , it's only 1 hour and 15 minutes left till weekend once more. Can't wait to jet off to the car and drive home with almost empty petrol tank.
AS you know my old junk Honda drinks petrol like nobody's business and is killing me slowly. Looking at the brighter side, I better dun complain so much lar,cos' don't need to pay car installment like some of you does. Ngekngek.


It has been a very mundane week only the fact that my favvy team won the world cup. Nothing nice happen besides that.

So keen to watch back to back season of 'Lost'. I buta-buta go bought the whole DVD set after lunch yesterday =(
Tangan gatal lor, see got money in wallet cannot tahan, need to spend. Grrrr
I never regretted buying it though.

Feel like going for alcohol booze tonight , Laundry anyone? Dunno what's the hype about that place... I need to check it out !! after failing twice to land a sit because of over crowded. KNN!

And also, this weekend I'm going to show-off my inherited mahjong genes from grandma and let it all out in a session of dry-swimming ! woohoooooo~~ Watch out you 2 !! I'm coming for your wallet.

It has been awhile ! I'm missing the touch. =)

LAstly, I have not told anyone before, but I never added anonymous person in friendster before. Like a total complete stranger. I find it real awkward to know someone through the website.

But yesterday, I have no idea what went through me. Shyly, I added someone >.<. She resembles someone I wish I knew from somewhere. It's complicated. But the good news is, she approved it ! woohoo Super happy man.

Now the next thing is to get her msn. and errr cross my fingers?

Sweet looking girl i tell ya. Really one. No lie you. =)

Lastly a pic of me looking at "The Tower" ! ( I Was curious of what my mate order during a drinking session in Chinoz, Klcc,and when it came, OMFG TOWER!!! !!! So Fcuking Roxor!! )

(look at my jakun face, hehe actually leh, I was staring at something else.. sshh)

Come lar let's bottoms up !

Happy weekend peeple~

Too much free time.

No words can describe how incredibly bored I am right now.

Really, I'm bored. VERY VERY BORED. So bored to the extend that I'm fishing in the office. I need one way to stay awake, so I'm standing right. Tried slapping myself a few times on the face , but not helping much.

B
Oo
Rrr
I i i i
Nnnnn
Gggggg

B-O-R-I-N-G

Long long time ago, we made a video on Chap Goh Mei , released recently over here
Kenot see my face lar, the video was too dark.

Round 1


I think both oso bodoh, Materazzi backside itchy, and Zidane of all people, lost his cool.

The head butt gotta hurt. =)











After watching the video, I can conclude that both of them undergo secret society training. Serious 1 no lie you.

Zidane's headbutt skill came from

E-HONDA from Street Fighter ! hoo hoo hoo hoo!










Materazzi's mulut bisa came from
George Semak-samun

Ok I'm officially bored.

=(

WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS!

ITALY - 2006 WORLD CUP CHAMPIONS

4 stars babeh !!! 4 muthafucking stars!!!!


Prophecy was right all along !!!
The scandals back in domestic football, the friendly game with Switzerland , the mathematical 12 years appearance in finals , it all came through!

1 month of watching Italy going through grueling matches after matches and finally lifting the cup is simply ecstatic !!! Relishing a childhood dream. I'm sure in your lifetime, you would like to watch your favourite team lift the mother of all cup at least ONCE. I did ! and many many many young Italian fans did as well.
More of matches like this , I'll end up having heart attack. My heart runs so wild I hardly have time to catch my breath.

Honestly, Italy looked doom when it comes to penalty shootouts, (94' & 98' World Cup) but yesterday night, they buried the ghost and emerged as champions.An Italian Job well done !

Once again, sending off proves to be the turning point of the game . The departure of France's maestro, the magician , the contender of Golden Ball award, the man who change 'Les Bleus' destiny to the finals; Zinedine Zidane proves to be the decisive turn of a high profile match.

To all you sour grapes out there, sheer luck my ass ! Eat your heart out cos Italy is bringing the cup home. Remember this image as it will be remembered for years to come

FORZA AZZURRI !!!

ps : Mr.Lippi , when are you shaving your head like your promised? =)

pictures courtesy of soccernet.com. yea i curi peoples image.=)

I want back my youth!!

Weekend is around the corner once more.

I no longer wait anxiously for weekend to arrive like I used to. Minus the sleep I get, it's just a normal boring day altogether. I want back my high school carefree days where I rely heavily on my allowances to survive. It has been 8 long years since I last step foot on the school ground. Every inch and corner of the school bring back fond memories. =/ (i don't do staircase kinky stuffs ok)

I miss eating free wantans during recess
I miss pendidikan jasmani with my librarian pants.
I miss Mr.Anthony and his dirty mind.
I miss all the gossips and saucy news about girls in my school.
I miss singing Negaraku and putting stones in friends pocket/bag.
I miss skipping school just to have teh-tarik in nearby mamak
I miss jumping over the fence like an olympic champ just to go back home and pangsai.
I miss school exams and the opportunity to copy.
I miss sitting behind of Sunita and pulling her hair. (shes still hot ok)
I miss not doing homework.
I miss bullying Kirk Keong and teasing him with ManGuan. (is that how you spell her name?)
I miss those malay guys.
I miss anti-ing prefects
I miss playing conquer!
I miss spot-checks and going gelabah over liquid paper
I miss calling my headmistress 'penguin' and seeing her walk like 1.
I miss sleeping in class and the after class Royal rumble.
I miss watching school fights
I miss wet baju kurung girls =)
I miss friendly football matches and tournaments.
I miss merentas desa and sports day.
I miss those days of chorus speaking competition.
I miss playing soccer in hockey field and breaking classroom window glasses
I miss breaking tabung uji and bikar or burn stuffs with penunu bunsen.
I miss seeing people sitting outside of Maggie Mee's class because they didnt finish their homework.
I miss making fake tattoos on friends hand.
I miss playing with chemical and making intials with it.
I miss going tarkei and slot machines after school
I miss playing snooker =(

The list can go on..
and most of all I miss being myself =/

Can we actually go back 1 day?

Just one day is enough.